Acceleration!!

Had dinner with the committee for the June Youth camp and had a chance to talk with the pastors and leaders of the church.

Wow!! It was a very encouraging talk. We could ALL see the same thing, the same vision!! We could see God bringing the church forth in such a mighty way to influence the world around us!

It was especially encouraging to hear what Rev. Hoon and Rev. Ang have to say about their thoughts and visions. Everything is falling into place and we can actually see it. :)

Fangmin used a very good word today - ACCELERATION! God is accelerating the church through this period of increased anointing, increased blessing, increased wisdom, increased efficiency ....

It's so encouraging to see God working in such wonderful an great ways!!

Blessed .. $$$

When you've prayed every pray that you know how to pray,
Just remember that God is working in ways you cannot see .... :)

I just received a substantial amount of financial blessing from a couple of good friends in the ministry. Really thank God for this blessing! And I know that when we're faithful in our tithes and offerings, God is also faithful in providing for us! :)

Amen!!

From Glory to Glory ...

Well, Expo was 3 days ago, fell terribly sick on Sunday night, almost lost my voice on Mon morn, but thank God He sustained me. :)

Was supposed to meet the script writer for this year's Christmas Harvest event this afternoon but was too sick to meet her so I asked Rev. Ang and the Deacon in-charge to go ahead and meet her. I still dunnoe the outcome of the meeting but I'm placing my trust in God that His plan will be fulfilled. I think after the Expo event, most of the P&W team is ready and looking forward to an even more happening Christmas! :)

While at home, I made sure I didn't waste any time, wrote out a master blue print for an operations overhaul in the church. Wow! It was amazing!! I mean, when the Holy Spirit is with you and gives you the anointing and the ideas, you write really quickly. :) It wasn't like it came all at once, but the ideas came over the whole period I was praying and seeking the Lord, so it was really easy to put it into writing when the need arose. :)

Well, we're really moving from Glory to Glory and Strength to strength. We must never let go of God in the process, always remember why we are here and who put us here. :)

Dear God ...

Dear God, it's me again
I am so far from where I could have been
Dear God, I would be incomplete
But you came and touched my life in time of need
So I'm thanking you for all you've done
And for sacrificing your only son

That's why I'm writing you this letter
To let you know that I love you
Thank you for all that I am and for being a friend
Lord, my love for you will never end

Dear God, it's me this time
I'm so grateful for the way you've changed my life
I'd give all I have, I'd just throw it all away
For a chance to walk with you through Heaven's gates
That's why I'm thanking you for your love and your grace
I don't deserve these blessings that you give me

Dear God, as a humble man I come to you like a child
Needing your knowledge, your love, and your guidance, Lord
Thank you for trusting me with my own life's decisions
But I'm just a man, and I don't deserve
This incredible life that you've given me
I love you Lord, I love you

Dear God, it's me
I'm so sorry, so sorry for living for me
But I promise from this day on I'm livin' for you
Cause without you my life means nothing

Endless wants and the price of quality ..

When I first re-started this blog, I did some "referencing" to see how other's people's blogs look like and what content a typical blog usually has. One of the commonalities I noticed was that most people's blogs had a "Wish List" placed pretty high on either side of their blogs. :)

At first, I wanted to put in a similar list but at that time, I really didn't have anything that I really WANTED per say (except maybe my own car? haha) so I left that list out.


*~short aside~*
Looking back, maybe even just 6-9 months ago, my wish list would have been full of things, items that I want, that would make my "life complete" for that moment in time. I really thank God that He has and still is slowly teaching me that contentment is not about always having more things and having everything.

One lesson I learnt was in Psalms 23:1, "The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want"

Many people interpret that as, The Lord is my Shepherd, He will give me everything so I shall not "be in want."

But the way I look at it, it tells me, The Lord is my Shepherd, so I will be content with what I have, and I shall not keep wanting stuff. Does that sound reasonable to you? :)

Somehow, by divine intervention, I have and I am starting to "want" things less. I guess for me, that is a "rhema" word from God.

*~coming back to the main post~*

So having no wish list, does that mean I absolutely have no problems about wanting stuff? Of course not! I still do struggle with wanting better stuff occasionally and most recently, after the expo production, I went on a quest to find a "reference" pair of speakers for my room so that I could listen to music "better." Maybe all that sound tweaking at Expo gave me the urge to tweak the sound in my room too.

Happened to be at Millenia Walk on Sunday afternoon and I was blown away at the Bose Experience center at the Bose Companion 3 speakers.

So the whole night, I was looking at the catalogue I got from the shop and planning to buy the speakers really soon. In fact, I was even thinking of putting up a wish list on my blog and have the Bose speakers as my first entry.

Then I realised, hey, I still have my set of 5.1 speakers from Cambridge Soundworks (before Creative bought them over) I bought in 1999 - 8 years ago!

So I set it up, plugged my laptop into it and WOW!! I was blown away by the sound of it too! One thing you have to know is that I am very particular about sound and tone, and very seldom impressed with stuff. So, when I'm impressed, it really says something.

Well, maybe the high end (treble) of the Cambridge speakers were not as pronounced as the Bose, but even so, they still sound pretty darn good! The Cambridge might not be as sleek or as pretty, but hey, they're pretty cute too! And anyway, as you can see from the pics below, I dun really have a good place for the Bose babies yet. :) Although I do intend to get a study table where I can work more productively. :)

Pic 1: Laptop on bed with satellite speakers.

Pic 2: Decoder on top of subwoofer.


The Price of Quality

So, besides saying what I have already said, I also have this to say. Quality is very important, and we must never be afraid to pay for quality - true quality.

When I bought the Cambridge speakers, they were one of the most expensive computer speakers at that time, but they were also the best. So having paid more than $500 for them, I can still enjoy them now, 8 years later and get pretty good sound I must say.

People who know me know that I only go for the best. In fact, my parents sometimes think I spend too much on certain stuff, but at the end of the day, I spend once and enjoy that thing for longer. Other than saving money, I save the time and hassle of having to shop and buy to replace that item.

I apply that same concept to everything I do, in fact, even the sound system and wireless mics in my church now can be used at any concert or production without any shame and will last a long time. :)

I've owned my current line-up of bass guitars for more than 3 years now and I don't have any intention of changing them soon, cos they already do what they've supposed to do.

I've owned my current mobile phone beyond the life of my subscription contract (2 yrs) and it can still do the same things any other modern phone can do (except wi-fi and GPS) and it's still worth pretty good $ in current trade-in schemes. In fact, my last 2 phones have been the same situation.

Now, I'm not saying that expensive is always the best, it's just a matter of making the right choice and not being afraid to choose the best when you know it is the right one.

Some people think saving money is about spending as little as possible on one thing. In fact, some people even boast about how little they spend on certain things.

My concept is, spend in such a way that the money you spend can give you maximum enjoyment for a maximum amount of time. It's not the absolute value that matters, in the long run, it's the relative value that counts. The amount of enjoyment you get and the amount of time you save replacing the item is not even measurable.

OK, I think I've said my piece and it seems this has been a really long post. I'm really interested to hear what you think bout this issue. Do drop a comment if you see fit. :)

A new era for BPC!!

Just finished a great event! 2008, Inter-denominational Gospel Rally. It was a great production. Really, I think it's a wonderful gift from God. The entire team enjoyed the worship and the entire production.

I think I had the most fun - in some ways it was a dream come true for me. Although I've been involved in big and small productions in the past, this is the first time I've been in almost total control of the technical aspect of the production and it WAS AMAZING!! :)

Really THANK GOD for this opportunity and I KNOW FOR SURE this is just the FIRST STEP for us and a preview of GREATER THINGS TO COME!! :)

AMEN!!

Running the Race .. Forwards ...

Been spending the entire day "uncluttering" my room. Going through each and every single article and throwing out stuff that belongs only in the past.

I realised that although there are things that really needed to go (college books and old magazines), some things reminded me of things that I really enjoyed and a period in my life where I thought I was "chasing the dream."

There was a time where I was playing bass semi-professionally, getting paid to play music, getting paid to be an audio-engineer, touring Asia with the production, The Magic of Love etc.

Besides the money and "professional" area in my musical life, I was actually playing music EVERY single day. It was either rehearsals for my own recitals, playing for other people's concerts, composing/arranging music for commercials and movies besides assignments. That was only on weekdays. On weekends, it was playing in church and coming up with new arrangements new songs, being a sound engineer and creating the best tones with the rest of the musicians etc. I mean, I actually enjoyed and looked forward to playing in church every week!

To me, that was it! I was living the life - I thought I could do that all my life. In fact, I was very contented and was already heading that direction.

Now, it seems everything has changed. Going through my old stuff - the old concert scores, concert programs, musical arrangements, email exchanges etc. I really really miss the life of a musician.

Even though I know what I'm pursuing now is from God, there really are times where it all becomes a struggle. There are times when I ask God, is this really it? I have put so much effort into my ministry and have strived so hard for the passion and the excellence in the ministry and the company that sometimes I think the joy of serving is slowly creeping out of me. I'm praying so hard that it won't.

Very few people know this, but I do feel very lonely serving in the current ministry in my church. Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one trying so hard to push the ministry forward. I really thank God that recently more and more people are getting enthusiastic about going forward with the ministry and I pray that they'll get even MORE passionate about serving. Serving not as a responsibility, but as a Passion - a Passion for God, a Passion for Jesus, a Passion for the Holy Spirit.

~~~~~

There is something very heavy on my heart now. As I was going through my old music stuff, I realised that although my passion has grown for serving the Lord, I have neglected a very special person in my life. In fact, because I was not careful, I have let the "work" affect the "love" in my relationship with Salome. Because we are both serving so actively in the ministry and so many things need to be done in a growing ministry, we hardly have time for ourselves. Any free time we have would be allocated to ministry meetings, training our musicians, meeting our youths, planning and organising ministry stuff like the coming Expo event.

It really has taken a toll on us. I can't even remember the last time we went out together - just the 2 of us. Nowadays, it seems like the things we talk about hardly leave the subject of our ministry or our church. It's actually scary. It's hard to even talk about other things, but that's not the scariest part. The scariest part is that sometimes we get so tired with "work," we don't even talk to each other at all. I think it's been almost one week since I actually talked to Salome over the phone besides the occasional call asking about arrangements for certain church events was more than a week ago.

In the past, we would rehearse for shows together, compose and arrange music together for projects and that really kept the fire burning in our relationship. Now, it seems we have let the "work" over take us.

This is not a lamentation. This is just a very scary wake up call and I know that if I don't do something about this now, the conclusion wouldn't be very sweet. Knowing that, however, I also know that there is a long and difficult race to run in my ministry and my calling. I pray for God's wisdom in balancing my life - to run the race with passion and determination but at the same time keeping space in my heart and life for the people I love and care about.

To all my friends, youths and fellow runners in the race, please pray for Salome and pray for me. Most importantly, please pray for us. It's not easy being leaders in the ministry - it's even harder when BOTH of us not only want to lead a team; we want to be HISTORY MAKERS in this ministry and influence the world around us to be different - to have a Passion for Excellence to serve our God who truly deserves it!

~~~

Coming back, I think one thing that's really really really cool is that at the end of the day, even through all the stuff I'm facing, I know my destination and I know I'm going on the right track. I know that my destination is to be a History maker and to bring a Passion for Excellence into the kingdom of God.

This afternoon I got an SMS from Fangmin and it said,

"Blessed is he who reads and those who hear the words of this prophecy, and keep those things which are written in it; for the time is near."

She said she got an impression of this verse for me and the time is near. I really pray that it is so. That the time will be near, when the prophecies that the Lord has so graciously given to me will come through!

Amen!

Weird? Different.

I feel weird. Sometimes I feel like an alien. I feel different from the people around me.

I was just talking with my brother the other night and we realised that since young, we never did the things our friends did - we never played the normal computer games, in fact, our first computer was an Apple; yes, a MAC! :) In the 1990s playing games on a Mac was virtually never heard of! :)

Instead of vacationing in cities and shopping, our parents brought us to villages in Malaysia to do mission work, brought us adventure travelling around the world, Australia, New Zealand, Europe, Canada ... Snowboarding, Whaling, Helicopter Stunt rides, Parachuting, Mountaineering, Jungle trekking - all these before I was even 18!! It's not so much about the amount we traveled or the places we went, but HOW we traveled that really impacted me and changed my life.

Even now when I travel with other people, I can never get used to the more conservative "by the book, always know where I am" concept of travel. I'm always longing to find that adventure in every trip

Now when we're older, both of us wanna start our own companies and our own ministries. In fact, I realised most of my friends are already working and getting very stable incomes, with great futures ahead. :) And here I am, never ever had a fixed monthly income job and now I wanna start a new company.

Sometimes I really feel like an alien - not many people understand the passion behind starting a company and a ministry from scratch, to live with "unstable income," to live with so many uncertainties. Well, my certainty is in the Lord! :)

Not even the big things all the time, even the things my friends like to do - watch soccer, play video games .. I don't know why, I'm just not wired that way.

I do feel weird, not only sometimes, all the time. I thank God he has made me this way, but I still continue to wonder WHY He made me this way. Although I do feel special and unique sometimes, other times, it really is difficult to think and behave different from the people around. But of course, my assurance is that the Lord has a destiny planned just for me.

Conquering Reality

Met up with an advisor and potential investor in my company and suddenly the reality of everything set in.
Besides the assurance from God that this ministry will prosper and grow, there are so many details to look into, so many MORE things to prepare.
There's also the whole issue about money and projection and how to keep the company moving forward in the long run.
I don't know why, but it seems like I'm always anxious about whether this is the route I'm supposed to take - like I mentioned in the first post, I'm gonna go ahead in faith, and God will smoothen everything out. :)

The advisor I met yesterday put everything into perspective - God is the boss of this company and I'm just a manager of His resources. So it's not up to me what happens as long as God is pleased. He also reminded me of Philippians 4:6, :Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
So I'm not supposed to be anxious, but to give thanks! :)

It seemed pretty weird towards the end of yesterday's meeting cause I was supposed to pitch my proposal to him, but he was so convinced of the idea that eventually he was encouraging me and giving me strategies for my company. HAHAHA .. :)

I really thank God for potential investors like that. :)

People have been asking me what this company will be all about. Well, do keep praying for me and once I put all the final details together, I'll reveal it to everyone. :)

Serving the God of my youth,
Jeremy Ng

It's starting soon .. really soon ..

I don't know why but this morning I just felt like blogging, even though I didn't know wat to blog about. :)

I just wanna say I'm so sure about Paradigm Shift. About the ministry God has placed in my heart. The ministry of Excellence, the ministry of Creativity, the ministry of Passion, the ministry of GOD.

It's one of those things where God puts a vision and a passion in your heart and you know it's gonna happen but after that you wonder, oh God, I know the destination, so which route should I take? :)

Like I said previously, I've been seeking and praying and searching, but I remembered something last weekend - God will not lay out ALL his plans for us just so that we can and we will live by faith and in full dependence on Him.

He has already given me a vision, so I'm just gonna go ahead and start moving. Pulled out all my savings and investments last week and I'm gonna register Paradigm Shift as a company to facilitate the things we're gonna do.

I'm actually very excited. All you people out there, please pray for the ministry k? :) It's a step of faith and God honours our faith. :)

Also, please check out the "official" logo for the registered company on the top of the blog. :) Decided I need something to give me a boost so I had this designed. Thanks to my brother for his help. I thank God for the creative and excellence spirit in him!! He doesn't think so but I think he's really gifted! :)

My life is on the altar

There is a journey to be embarked on. A road to travel. Which path should I take God? I lay my life at your altar, I'll do whatever you want me to do. It doesn't have to make a lot of money, it doesn't have to be prestigious - as long as you want me to do it, I know it'll be the best!

It's been 2 months of seeking and praying. Searching for the ultimate route, the highest call. I've got ideas; LOTS of ideas. I was born to be imaginative, born to dream, born to see visions, but I'm also always wary of MY OWN ideas, MY OWN dreams and MY OWN visions. I wanna walk in my ultimate destiny; the long and dusty road, the straight and narrow path.

I know many roads lead to Rome, but I want to take the route that God wants me to take. Meet the people HE wants me to meet, encounter the situations and challenges HE wants me to conquer.
I know God wants me to go into full time ministry - I just don't see any open doors now. God, I know you have a plan for me, please show it to me SOON!! I can't wait any longer. I really can't. I know it's your timing Lord, but please give me a glimpse of your plans. Lord, just a glimpse to carry me through this time.

The prophecy from Korea was that my ministry will prosper, my spiritual walk will grow to the highest level. Oh God, I claim that in Jesus' name. I really do. Even if the situation doesn't look like it now, I claim your promises. I am a man of PASSION!!

I want to start a ministry, I want to start a ministry of Excellence. BUT, God, it's not MY ministry. It's YOUR ministry. Teach me and help me to remember that. I'm just an empty vessel you use. It's not about the ministry and the things we can do - it's about the people we touch and the lives we change.

So, whether it's to start a music school, a music ministry, or something as humble as cleaning up the operations in my church, I know one thing for sure. I'm gonna be a HISTORY MAKER!

The most important thing though, God, which path do you want me to take? It is only by the Grace of God that I am standing at this crossroad making this decision. It is only by HIS GRACE that I am here today.

I just saw the lyrics to a song KC just wrote and it moved me to tears - as in I just burst out crying ... reading his blog, I realize a Great songwriter in all our eyes faces the same struggles we all do. Is going full-time really that hard? Is it really FOOL-TIME? One thing for sure, it is all in HIS HANDS.

GOD OF MY FOREVER

Verse 1
God of my youth I remember
Your call on my life took me o'er
Your love has seen me through all my days
I stand here by Your grace
On this altar I've written my life
Tells of a story I have with You my Lord
I want the world to know

Chorus
God of my forever
And forever I'm with You
My life is saved with a price
Your sacrifice redeemed my soul
God of my forever
And forever I will sing
My greatest honor will always be
To serve my Lord and King

Verse 2
God of my all I've surrendered
My heart finds its rest in Your word
Praises will not be enough to show
How my love for You has grown
Nothing matters when You're here with me
In the end just to hear You say "Well done"
Bowing before Your throne