I've got a great Job!!

Wow, it's been almost one full month since my last blog entry. :) I wonder how many people still check out this blog. :)

Anyway, it's been a really busy and exciting month. Had 2 major conferences this month and the anointing and blessing of God was so great in the church. There is an in-filling of a greater anointing and presence of the Holy Spirit.

I led prayer meeting last night and the Holy Spirit did His thing - it was an exciting time. :)

There's committee meeting later on and it's the first time I'll be sitting in since I just became a staff of the church, so I'm pretty excited, but at the same time a little nervous about what kinds of questions will be thrown at me .. haha .. :) Well, my God is with me .. so no worries! :)

Who do you please?

Who are we supposed to please? Whose voice do we listen to? Whose opinion really matters?

The past 3 weeks have been bittersweet for me working in the church. On one hand, I'm having a lot of fun doing the things I've got a passion for and dreaming up ideas for the church. On the other hand, I feel like I'm being held back and restricted from going on in a lot of things. It seems like there is always the concern of what people might say or what people might think; there's always the concern of offending people.

It's been a time of training for me and the Lord is really teaching me submission, patience and more submission. He's also teaching me to look at an even BIGGER picture of what's happening around the church. I've always seen myself as a person who looks to the future and looks at the big picture. But the Lord is saying, Hey! There's a bigger picture for you to see .. there are more things to consider than you thought there were. Operating and running a church is not as easy as you thought!

Well, I guess I'm also starting to REALLY learn the lesson I've always tried to impart to other people. You don't have to satisfy everybody and make everybody happy - you just need to fulfill your responsibility and have your conscience clear before God.

I'm learning it the hard way now. It seems like EVERYONE has something to say about my job and how I should do it. Everyone thinks they know what's best for me. I was actually really hurt today when one of my respected leaders said," What have you done the past 3 weeks working in church, do you have anything to show for it?"

Well, the line between who's right and who's wrong is starting to gray ....

..... but tonight during prayer meeting, the Lord spoke again. With the same song He touched me with when I was considering full time ministry, telling him I'll do whatever He wants me to do ( My Life is on the Altar )The same words spoke to me, but this time another phrase shot straight into my heart -

"Nothing matters when You're here with me
In the end just to hear You say "Well done"
Bowing before your throne"

Yes that's it! Nothing matters when God is with me. No one's opinion matters more than what God thinks. Who cares which leader praises me, who cares if "other people" think I've done a good job. In the end, I just wanna hear my FATHER GOD say "WELL DONE" That's all that matters to me. REALLY.

Thank you God for the reassurance. My greatest honor with always be to serve my Lord and King.

Passion of Work

Wow, it's been so long since my last entry. Been really busy at work and seriously, I didn't expect to be this busy ... haha ...

Well, lots of exciting things happening and visions being shared.:)

The church just got a new back drop for the sanctuary stage and I'm sitting in my office now having just pulled an all-nighter putting everything back on stage and trying very hard to make the stage tidy - to match the very elegant backdrop.

I'm so tired now - but most importantly, I'm happy and I enjoy my job so much!

I guess although I love the job, I really do feel the pressure of the job. Given the circumstances and the relationships I share with people in the church, I'm under pressure to not only perform, but to perform OUTSTANDINGLY.

I seriously don't know how to explain it. Deep in my heart I really really have a deep passion for my job and a passion for excellence for the church, but at the same time, I'm conscious that there are lots of people in the church (both "supporters" and "non-supporters") whose eyes are on me to see what results I'll produce for the church. I'm praying my passion for excellence will outshine any expectations on me - even my own expectations. I am working not for the church - I am working for God - so people's expectations do not matter - only God's expectations matter.

Most importantly however, there is one thing I know for sure - it is my God who has put me where I am now. If there is anyone who will support me all the way, encourage me and give me the wisdom and anointing to face my job, it is my God. So if my God is for me, WHO CAN BE AGAINST ME?

In Christ there is love, and perfect love casts out all fear! :) Wow, I guess Sunday did help! :)

Well, time to get some rest and get ready for a new day!

Work!

Well, surprisingly there's nothing much to blog about during my first week at work. Everything's going really well and there're lots of interesting people to meet and things to do.

It feels pretty good having my own office and actually, this being my first week at work, I've already met up with 4 vendors in 2 days! So it's quite fun! :)

People are fun too. I think it's really very different from the old church office. I feel happier when I enter the office now. :)

Just thought I'd give an update. :)

I start work on Monday!

Well, just wanted to announce to the world that I just got notice that

I will be a full-time staff at Bethany Presbyterian Church effective Oct 1, 2007!

Short hello ..

Writing this blog at the Senior Pastor's house in Sabah .. had cell group here ...

It's also house of Stefanie Sun and Zhang Hui Mei's pianist .. :) Will write more next time .. :)

Sabah ...

Hi all,

It's been a great trip and here are more updates! My brother went back to Singapore on Wed night so now I'm "alone." :) Food's been great, and at last the skies cooperated and I've been able to take the telescope out for a great view. :)

Family fellowship has been one of the greatest highlight of the trip and it has really been great spending so much time with the family, talking, laughing and talking some more.

Also had a chance to eat a fruit I haven't been able to eat for 20 years. The Talap. This is a local fruit and is only available in limited quantities in a very tight season every year.

The picture below is of my brother and cousin trying to open durians the day before the Talap. :)

Panaromic view from the 3rd storey of my auntie's house. If I had a view like this in my house, I'd build an observatory right away! :)

More from my obsession with 4x4s ....

In Sabah

Almost nearing the middle of my trip in Sabah - been spending my time with the family and doing lots of fun stuff.

Went to the beach and played some traditional "kampung games," drove around, ate some of my childhood favourite foods etc. :)

Also visited the local Chinese church and I could see that the Holy Spirit is doing a work in the local church which is really exciting. Not only could I see the Spirit moving, I could also see some of the same problems in a "family church" setting here in Sabah as it is in Singapore.

I am even more convinced of God's calling for the ministry He has placed me in and this ministry will touch and bless churches all around the world - typical smaller "family" churches for them to be equipped for revival!

Though this trip is meant to be one of getting away from things and seeking God, I find myself unconsciously thinking of stuff in Singapore, in the church and in the ministry. It's nothing much really, just that I find myself so absorbed in the ministry. :)

Anyway, besides all these, one of my greatest automotive passions is always renewed when I come back to Sabah - the legendary 4x4!!

Every time I come here, I get updated of the latest 4x4 vehicles available and I marvel at their off road capabilities.

People all around me in Singapore always talk about getting the fastest and best looking sports car and how much horsepower their car can give or how many people their vehicle can carry.

Well, I'm not interested in all that, I'm just interested in how much torque the vehicle has, how many tons it can carry and pull and most importantly, how far into the forest or how high up a mountain it can go. :)

Oh well - I'm gonna get my first 4x4 vehicle soon - and please, nothing like the Toyota Rush or even Lexus RX300. HAHA ... I want a REAL 4WD!! :)

OK, enough talking - here are some pictures ...

Gone for 2 weeks ..

Well, I'm leaving in a few hours for Sabah and I won't be back for 2 weeks. Sabah is a land full of culture and scenery ... Such a beautiful place right here in South East Asia ..

Many people have said it's so fun to go on holiday for 2 weeks and they're so jealous and they also wanna go ...

Well, for me, I think this trip goes beyond a "holiday" or a "fun trip" for me. Firstly, I'll be there to visit dear family whom I love A LOT ... I think I need to play my part as part of the family to be there in good times and in bad. :)

Also, on a more serious note, I'll be there to get away from the routine of life and familiarity of my surroundings. It'll be a time also to seek God and to refresh myself for a new journey that I will embark on in the middle of Oct.

The entire trip is unplanned - my brother and I just bought 2 tickets there and don't have any plans on what to do. To me that is very intentional - I just wanna go on an adventure and not have to worry about this plan and that plan.

One more thing is I'm praying that this trip will really draw me closer to my brother and allow us to know each other better. I really thank God for the relationship we have and I see God working through us individually and as brothers. I pray this trip will do greater things for us. :)

So there you have it - this is not just a fun trip - I've even got objectives planned .. haha .. :)


Anyway, here are some photos taken in Sabah for those who have been asking me how come I say Sabah can see more stars than Singapore -

Casting Call ...

Hi all,

Below is the casting call for a local film. I'd encourage
all those who would like to experience what it's like to
shoot a movie or be part of a movie production to sign up
either as actors/extras or production crew.

This will also be a good opportunity for those of you
after 'N', 'O' and 'A' levels to learn something during
your holidays and earn some pocket money. :)

If you have any queries, pls contact the director of the film.
Contact details are below.

Hi Friends,

I am currently directing my final year thesis film, <> (Dreams), a 15 minute short film about an ordinary boy who dared to achieve an extraordinary dream of becoming a national swimmer, despite the opposition and rejection he receives from his family and community. It is a story about faith, love and the courage to dream. The film is one that will surely inspire the hearts of many.

My production team and I are searching for cast members to act in the film and would like to extend the invitation to you. You can also help us by passing the message and casting call to your friends and family members who might be interested to be part of this film.

In addition to these, we are also in the process of sourcing for crew members who are willing to work as Art Directors & Production Assistants for the film. Do reply if you are interested.

Please feel free to contact me at 97778120, should you have any queries or require any clarification.


Thank You for Dreaming with Us.

Yours Sincerely,
Josiah Ng
Director
Meng Xiang.

Evan Almighty

Watched Evan Almighty today ... Wow!! Even though it's supposed to be a comedy - and IT IS HILARIOUS - I got quite a lot out of the movie. Some of it even has to do with being a History Maker as I've mentioned in my earlier posts ...

Here's what I got - I'm trying to remember the lines ...

1. "How do you change the world?" "By doing Actions of Random Kindness. You change the world one act at a time"

2. "When someone prays for patience, does God give her patience or opportunities to be patient? .... When someone prays for a closer knit family, ....... , God gives her a chance to be closer to her family"

Those were "quotes" I tried to remember off the movie ... There're also other stuff I thought were pretty true about God in the movie ..

~Alot of times, God gives us a task or job to do and even though sometimes we resist it at first, God will chase us - He will not give up on us the first time. Yes it's true God will not force us, but He will not give up on us.

~When we ask for stuff, God sometimes will not give it to us outright. Instead, He will use lessons and give us opportunities to exercise our character and let us get more than what we ask for in the process.

~When God gives us a task, there'll be times when it seems no one else believes in what we're doing, but when we're sure God's asking us to do it, we gotta put our faith in Him and do it. God will in His own way turn the hearts of the people around us and give us the support we need.

~There's also a part in the movie when "God" said "I do it cos I love you" .... and then some terrible things happened to Evan and he said, "could you love me less?"
That was so real! I mean I've had people tell me and sometimes I feel it myself - when things go wrong or when the world seems to be against us and we know that God is actually teaching us and letting us grow in that process and He's allowing stuff to happen cos He loves us ... but sometimes we can't see His plan and we just wished all those things didn't happen. We forget that God will only let us go through things we can bear and He's pushing us to our limit so that we can stretch.

~Sometimes God will only show us results at the VERY END. We have to be firm in our faith and never give up. Even though the world will taunt us and tell us what we're doing is stupid and people dun understand, even our closest friends - we must know that God will never fail us.

~God works in ways we cannot understand. Like in this instance, even though God has promised HE will never send rain and flood to destroy the world, but still asked Evan to build the Ark. He was seeing a scenario that people would not imagine - even the people responsible for it didn't know it could happen. So we must do stuff God asks us to do even though we think God already promised something like that will never happen again.


That should be it for now - dun have any notes or anything, just writing off the top of my head. So I'll add more when I think of them .. :)
For those who don't know what I'm writing about, go watch the movie!!

Wow, I never thought I'd have so many things to write about a movie ... I guess I learnt that from my mentor (Yong Howe) who always applies life principles from movies. :)

It's like literature class ...

People ...

Relationships are fragile, people can be sensitive, God has put us among people to live among people to learn to love, to be compassionate and to know more about HIM.

People are important and they should never be taken for granted.
Every single person is important - from the person buying the groceries, to the chef, to the people cleaning the dishes.
From the pastor to the elders to the cell group leaders and members to the person locking the gate in church every night.

Every person is important. Remember that.

Vision 2020 - CCC

Got an email today and watched the video. Wow! The presentation of the entire vision just excites people. This is what I call imparting a vision!!

God Breathed ....

Have you ever wondered how God loves EVERY single person and EVERY single church?

It's like, ok, God loves me, so if some guy creates trouble for me, my God will fight for me, but at the same time, the same God loves that guy too and will do something good for him in that situation. I find this concept absolutely mind-blowing - even almost hard to believe to be even possible.

I never used to think bout this, but recently, with SO MANY wonderful things happening in church, in the ministry and in my life, I just can't help but wonder how everything fits together.

It's like for me personally, looking at it now, every single thing that happened in my life has made me into the person I am today. The experiences, the people I encountered, my family background, the places I've lived in, have all shaped me into the person I am today.

So this person, me, through miraculous circumstances comes into contact with Bethany Presbyterian Church (BPC), and because of his background, attitude (problem?? :) ), rashness, life experiences, does certain things in a church, changes some stuff, ruffles more than a few feathers etc. etc. etc.

At the same time, God has already put BPC through her share of experiences, trials and joys for 105 years and the Holy Spirit comes and visit at just the right time, with just the right amount and puts just the right people in the congregation and the leadership so that when Jeremy comes into the church, he will be challenged enough to grow tremendously, but at the same time not stretched till he is overly discouraged.

I find it really amazing the path God has set for EVERY SINGLE PERSON. I mean, I'm just writing from the viewpoints of 2 "parties" - a person and a church. Can you imagine how everything links if we go through the stories of every person in church?!?!?! :)


When I look back at the things that happened and everything that somehow brought me to this point in my life, I am SO SO SO sure that God has placed me in this situation, in this church, with these opportunities and responsibilities, and most importantly, with this anointing that is meant JUST FOR ME!!

There is no other explanation. God is just so amazing!!

Opportunities of a lifetime must be grabbed in the lifetime of the opportunity.

I am going to make full use of this opportunity God has given me to be a History-Maker in church. To make a difference - a HUGE DIFFERENCE!!

Oh my goodness, this opportunity is something that not only I but our senior pastor didn't think possible just one month ago!! It's so amazing!!

What's this opportunity?? Stay tuned - I can't reveal it just as yet. :)

I can only tell you - IT IS GOD BREATHED ...

I love you GOD!! :)

Acceleration!!

Had dinner with the committee for the June Youth camp and had a chance to talk with the pastors and leaders of the church.

Wow!! It was a very encouraging talk. We could ALL see the same thing, the same vision!! We could see God bringing the church forth in such a mighty way to influence the world around us!

It was especially encouraging to hear what Rev. Hoon and Rev. Ang have to say about their thoughts and visions. Everything is falling into place and we can actually see it. :)

Fangmin used a very good word today - ACCELERATION! God is accelerating the church through this period of increased anointing, increased blessing, increased wisdom, increased efficiency ....

It's so encouraging to see God working in such wonderful an great ways!!

Blessed .. $$$

When you've prayed every pray that you know how to pray,
Just remember that God is working in ways you cannot see .... :)

I just received a substantial amount of financial blessing from a couple of good friends in the ministry. Really thank God for this blessing! And I know that when we're faithful in our tithes and offerings, God is also faithful in providing for us! :)

Amen!!

From Glory to Glory ...

Well, Expo was 3 days ago, fell terribly sick on Sunday night, almost lost my voice on Mon morn, but thank God He sustained me. :)

Was supposed to meet the script writer for this year's Christmas Harvest event this afternoon but was too sick to meet her so I asked Rev. Ang and the Deacon in-charge to go ahead and meet her. I still dunnoe the outcome of the meeting but I'm placing my trust in God that His plan will be fulfilled. I think after the Expo event, most of the P&W team is ready and looking forward to an even more happening Christmas! :)

While at home, I made sure I didn't waste any time, wrote out a master blue print for an operations overhaul in the church. Wow! It was amazing!! I mean, when the Holy Spirit is with you and gives you the anointing and the ideas, you write really quickly. :) It wasn't like it came all at once, but the ideas came over the whole period I was praying and seeking the Lord, so it was really easy to put it into writing when the need arose. :)

Well, we're really moving from Glory to Glory and Strength to strength. We must never let go of God in the process, always remember why we are here and who put us here. :)

Dear God ...

Dear God, it's me again
I am so far from where I could have been
Dear God, I would be incomplete
But you came and touched my life in time of need
So I'm thanking you for all you've done
And for sacrificing your only son

That's why I'm writing you this letter
To let you know that I love you
Thank you for all that I am and for being a friend
Lord, my love for you will never end

Dear God, it's me this time
I'm so grateful for the way you've changed my life
I'd give all I have, I'd just throw it all away
For a chance to walk with you through Heaven's gates
That's why I'm thanking you for your love and your grace
I don't deserve these blessings that you give me

Dear God, as a humble man I come to you like a child
Needing your knowledge, your love, and your guidance, Lord
Thank you for trusting me with my own life's decisions
But I'm just a man, and I don't deserve
This incredible life that you've given me
I love you Lord, I love you

Dear God, it's me
I'm so sorry, so sorry for living for me
But I promise from this day on I'm livin' for you
Cause without you my life means nothing

Endless wants and the price of quality ..

When I first re-started this blog, I did some "referencing" to see how other's people's blogs look like and what content a typical blog usually has. One of the commonalities I noticed was that most people's blogs had a "Wish List" placed pretty high on either side of their blogs. :)

At first, I wanted to put in a similar list but at that time, I really didn't have anything that I really WANTED per say (except maybe my own car? haha) so I left that list out.


*~short aside~*
Looking back, maybe even just 6-9 months ago, my wish list would have been full of things, items that I want, that would make my "life complete" for that moment in time. I really thank God that He has and still is slowly teaching me that contentment is not about always having more things and having everything.

One lesson I learnt was in Psalms 23:1, "The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want"

Many people interpret that as, The Lord is my Shepherd, He will give me everything so I shall not "be in want."

But the way I look at it, it tells me, The Lord is my Shepherd, so I will be content with what I have, and I shall not keep wanting stuff. Does that sound reasonable to you? :)

Somehow, by divine intervention, I have and I am starting to "want" things less. I guess for me, that is a "rhema" word from God.

*~coming back to the main post~*

So having no wish list, does that mean I absolutely have no problems about wanting stuff? Of course not! I still do struggle with wanting better stuff occasionally and most recently, after the expo production, I went on a quest to find a "reference" pair of speakers for my room so that I could listen to music "better." Maybe all that sound tweaking at Expo gave me the urge to tweak the sound in my room too.

Happened to be at Millenia Walk on Sunday afternoon and I was blown away at the Bose Experience center at the Bose Companion 3 speakers.

So the whole night, I was looking at the catalogue I got from the shop and planning to buy the speakers really soon. In fact, I was even thinking of putting up a wish list on my blog and have the Bose speakers as my first entry.

Then I realised, hey, I still have my set of 5.1 speakers from Cambridge Soundworks (before Creative bought them over) I bought in 1999 - 8 years ago!

So I set it up, plugged my laptop into it and WOW!! I was blown away by the sound of it too! One thing you have to know is that I am very particular about sound and tone, and very seldom impressed with stuff. So, when I'm impressed, it really says something.

Well, maybe the high end (treble) of the Cambridge speakers were not as pronounced as the Bose, but even so, they still sound pretty darn good! The Cambridge might not be as sleek or as pretty, but hey, they're pretty cute too! And anyway, as you can see from the pics below, I dun really have a good place for the Bose babies yet. :) Although I do intend to get a study table where I can work more productively. :)

Pic 1: Laptop on bed with satellite speakers.

Pic 2: Decoder on top of subwoofer.


The Price of Quality

So, besides saying what I have already said, I also have this to say. Quality is very important, and we must never be afraid to pay for quality - true quality.

When I bought the Cambridge speakers, they were one of the most expensive computer speakers at that time, but they were also the best. So having paid more than $500 for them, I can still enjoy them now, 8 years later and get pretty good sound I must say.

People who know me know that I only go for the best. In fact, my parents sometimes think I spend too much on certain stuff, but at the end of the day, I spend once and enjoy that thing for longer. Other than saving money, I save the time and hassle of having to shop and buy to replace that item.

I apply that same concept to everything I do, in fact, even the sound system and wireless mics in my church now can be used at any concert or production without any shame and will last a long time. :)

I've owned my current line-up of bass guitars for more than 3 years now and I don't have any intention of changing them soon, cos they already do what they've supposed to do.

I've owned my current mobile phone beyond the life of my subscription contract (2 yrs) and it can still do the same things any other modern phone can do (except wi-fi and GPS) and it's still worth pretty good $ in current trade-in schemes. In fact, my last 2 phones have been the same situation.

Now, I'm not saying that expensive is always the best, it's just a matter of making the right choice and not being afraid to choose the best when you know it is the right one.

Some people think saving money is about spending as little as possible on one thing. In fact, some people even boast about how little they spend on certain things.

My concept is, spend in such a way that the money you spend can give you maximum enjoyment for a maximum amount of time. It's not the absolute value that matters, in the long run, it's the relative value that counts. The amount of enjoyment you get and the amount of time you save replacing the item is not even measurable.

OK, I think I've said my piece and it seems this has been a really long post. I'm really interested to hear what you think bout this issue. Do drop a comment if you see fit. :)

A new era for BPC!!

Just finished a great event! 2008, Inter-denominational Gospel Rally. It was a great production. Really, I think it's a wonderful gift from God. The entire team enjoyed the worship and the entire production.

I think I had the most fun - in some ways it was a dream come true for me. Although I've been involved in big and small productions in the past, this is the first time I've been in almost total control of the technical aspect of the production and it WAS AMAZING!! :)

Really THANK GOD for this opportunity and I KNOW FOR SURE this is just the FIRST STEP for us and a preview of GREATER THINGS TO COME!! :)

AMEN!!

Running the Race .. Forwards ...

Been spending the entire day "uncluttering" my room. Going through each and every single article and throwing out stuff that belongs only in the past.

I realised that although there are things that really needed to go (college books and old magazines), some things reminded me of things that I really enjoyed and a period in my life where I thought I was "chasing the dream."

There was a time where I was playing bass semi-professionally, getting paid to play music, getting paid to be an audio-engineer, touring Asia with the production, The Magic of Love etc.

Besides the money and "professional" area in my musical life, I was actually playing music EVERY single day. It was either rehearsals for my own recitals, playing for other people's concerts, composing/arranging music for commercials and movies besides assignments. That was only on weekdays. On weekends, it was playing in church and coming up with new arrangements new songs, being a sound engineer and creating the best tones with the rest of the musicians etc. I mean, I actually enjoyed and looked forward to playing in church every week!

To me, that was it! I was living the life - I thought I could do that all my life. In fact, I was very contented and was already heading that direction.

Now, it seems everything has changed. Going through my old stuff - the old concert scores, concert programs, musical arrangements, email exchanges etc. I really really miss the life of a musician.

Even though I know what I'm pursuing now is from God, there really are times where it all becomes a struggle. There are times when I ask God, is this really it? I have put so much effort into my ministry and have strived so hard for the passion and the excellence in the ministry and the company that sometimes I think the joy of serving is slowly creeping out of me. I'm praying so hard that it won't.

Very few people know this, but I do feel very lonely serving in the current ministry in my church. Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one trying so hard to push the ministry forward. I really thank God that recently more and more people are getting enthusiastic about going forward with the ministry and I pray that they'll get even MORE passionate about serving. Serving not as a responsibility, but as a Passion - a Passion for God, a Passion for Jesus, a Passion for the Holy Spirit.

~~~~~

There is something very heavy on my heart now. As I was going through my old music stuff, I realised that although my passion has grown for serving the Lord, I have neglected a very special person in my life. In fact, because I was not careful, I have let the "work" affect the "love" in my relationship with Salome. Because we are both serving so actively in the ministry and so many things need to be done in a growing ministry, we hardly have time for ourselves. Any free time we have would be allocated to ministry meetings, training our musicians, meeting our youths, planning and organising ministry stuff like the coming Expo event.

It really has taken a toll on us. I can't even remember the last time we went out together - just the 2 of us. Nowadays, it seems like the things we talk about hardly leave the subject of our ministry or our church. It's actually scary. It's hard to even talk about other things, but that's not the scariest part. The scariest part is that sometimes we get so tired with "work," we don't even talk to each other at all. I think it's been almost one week since I actually talked to Salome over the phone besides the occasional call asking about arrangements for certain church events was more than a week ago.

In the past, we would rehearse for shows together, compose and arrange music together for projects and that really kept the fire burning in our relationship. Now, it seems we have let the "work" over take us.

This is not a lamentation. This is just a very scary wake up call and I know that if I don't do something about this now, the conclusion wouldn't be very sweet. Knowing that, however, I also know that there is a long and difficult race to run in my ministry and my calling. I pray for God's wisdom in balancing my life - to run the race with passion and determination but at the same time keeping space in my heart and life for the people I love and care about.

To all my friends, youths and fellow runners in the race, please pray for Salome and pray for me. Most importantly, please pray for us. It's not easy being leaders in the ministry - it's even harder when BOTH of us not only want to lead a team; we want to be HISTORY MAKERS in this ministry and influence the world around us to be different - to have a Passion for Excellence to serve our God who truly deserves it!

~~~

Coming back, I think one thing that's really really really cool is that at the end of the day, even through all the stuff I'm facing, I know my destination and I know I'm going on the right track. I know that my destination is to be a History maker and to bring a Passion for Excellence into the kingdom of God.

This afternoon I got an SMS from Fangmin and it said,

"Blessed is he who reads and those who hear the words of this prophecy, and keep those things which are written in it; for the time is near."

She said she got an impression of this verse for me and the time is near. I really pray that it is so. That the time will be near, when the prophecies that the Lord has so graciously given to me will come through!

Amen!

Weird? Different.

I feel weird. Sometimes I feel like an alien. I feel different from the people around me.

I was just talking with my brother the other night and we realised that since young, we never did the things our friends did - we never played the normal computer games, in fact, our first computer was an Apple; yes, a MAC! :) In the 1990s playing games on a Mac was virtually never heard of! :)

Instead of vacationing in cities and shopping, our parents brought us to villages in Malaysia to do mission work, brought us adventure travelling around the world, Australia, New Zealand, Europe, Canada ... Snowboarding, Whaling, Helicopter Stunt rides, Parachuting, Mountaineering, Jungle trekking - all these before I was even 18!! It's not so much about the amount we traveled or the places we went, but HOW we traveled that really impacted me and changed my life.

Even now when I travel with other people, I can never get used to the more conservative "by the book, always know where I am" concept of travel. I'm always longing to find that adventure in every trip

Now when we're older, both of us wanna start our own companies and our own ministries. In fact, I realised most of my friends are already working and getting very stable incomes, with great futures ahead. :) And here I am, never ever had a fixed monthly income job and now I wanna start a new company.

Sometimes I really feel like an alien - not many people understand the passion behind starting a company and a ministry from scratch, to live with "unstable income," to live with so many uncertainties. Well, my certainty is in the Lord! :)

Not even the big things all the time, even the things my friends like to do - watch soccer, play video games .. I don't know why, I'm just not wired that way.

I do feel weird, not only sometimes, all the time. I thank God he has made me this way, but I still continue to wonder WHY He made me this way. Although I do feel special and unique sometimes, other times, it really is difficult to think and behave different from the people around. But of course, my assurance is that the Lord has a destiny planned just for me.

Conquering Reality

Met up with an advisor and potential investor in my company and suddenly the reality of everything set in.
Besides the assurance from God that this ministry will prosper and grow, there are so many details to look into, so many MORE things to prepare.
There's also the whole issue about money and projection and how to keep the company moving forward in the long run.
I don't know why, but it seems like I'm always anxious about whether this is the route I'm supposed to take - like I mentioned in the first post, I'm gonna go ahead in faith, and God will smoothen everything out. :)

The advisor I met yesterday put everything into perspective - God is the boss of this company and I'm just a manager of His resources. So it's not up to me what happens as long as God is pleased. He also reminded me of Philippians 4:6, :Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
So I'm not supposed to be anxious, but to give thanks! :)

It seemed pretty weird towards the end of yesterday's meeting cause I was supposed to pitch my proposal to him, but he was so convinced of the idea that eventually he was encouraging me and giving me strategies for my company. HAHAHA .. :)

I really thank God for potential investors like that. :)

People have been asking me what this company will be all about. Well, do keep praying for me and once I put all the final details together, I'll reveal it to everyone. :)

Serving the God of my youth,
Jeremy Ng

It's starting soon .. really soon ..

I don't know why but this morning I just felt like blogging, even though I didn't know wat to blog about. :)

I just wanna say I'm so sure about Paradigm Shift. About the ministry God has placed in my heart. The ministry of Excellence, the ministry of Creativity, the ministry of Passion, the ministry of GOD.

It's one of those things where God puts a vision and a passion in your heart and you know it's gonna happen but after that you wonder, oh God, I know the destination, so which route should I take? :)

Like I said previously, I've been seeking and praying and searching, but I remembered something last weekend - God will not lay out ALL his plans for us just so that we can and we will live by faith and in full dependence on Him.

He has already given me a vision, so I'm just gonna go ahead and start moving. Pulled out all my savings and investments last week and I'm gonna register Paradigm Shift as a company to facilitate the things we're gonna do.

I'm actually very excited. All you people out there, please pray for the ministry k? :) It's a step of faith and God honours our faith. :)

Also, please check out the "official" logo for the registered company on the top of the blog. :) Decided I need something to give me a boost so I had this designed. Thanks to my brother for his help. I thank God for the creative and excellence spirit in him!! He doesn't think so but I think he's really gifted! :)

My life is on the altar

There is a journey to be embarked on. A road to travel. Which path should I take God? I lay my life at your altar, I'll do whatever you want me to do. It doesn't have to make a lot of money, it doesn't have to be prestigious - as long as you want me to do it, I know it'll be the best!

It's been 2 months of seeking and praying. Searching for the ultimate route, the highest call. I've got ideas; LOTS of ideas. I was born to be imaginative, born to dream, born to see visions, but I'm also always wary of MY OWN ideas, MY OWN dreams and MY OWN visions. I wanna walk in my ultimate destiny; the long and dusty road, the straight and narrow path.

I know many roads lead to Rome, but I want to take the route that God wants me to take. Meet the people HE wants me to meet, encounter the situations and challenges HE wants me to conquer.
I know God wants me to go into full time ministry - I just don't see any open doors now. God, I know you have a plan for me, please show it to me SOON!! I can't wait any longer. I really can't. I know it's your timing Lord, but please give me a glimpse of your plans. Lord, just a glimpse to carry me through this time.

The prophecy from Korea was that my ministry will prosper, my spiritual walk will grow to the highest level. Oh God, I claim that in Jesus' name. I really do. Even if the situation doesn't look like it now, I claim your promises. I am a man of PASSION!!

I want to start a ministry, I want to start a ministry of Excellence. BUT, God, it's not MY ministry. It's YOUR ministry. Teach me and help me to remember that. I'm just an empty vessel you use. It's not about the ministry and the things we can do - it's about the people we touch and the lives we change.

So, whether it's to start a music school, a music ministry, or something as humble as cleaning up the operations in my church, I know one thing for sure. I'm gonna be a HISTORY MAKER!

The most important thing though, God, which path do you want me to take? It is only by the Grace of God that I am standing at this crossroad making this decision. It is only by HIS GRACE that I am here today.

I just saw the lyrics to a song KC just wrote and it moved me to tears - as in I just burst out crying ... reading his blog, I realize a Great songwriter in all our eyes faces the same struggles we all do. Is going full-time really that hard? Is it really FOOL-TIME? One thing for sure, it is all in HIS HANDS.

GOD OF MY FOREVER

Verse 1
God of my youth I remember
Your call on my life took me o'er
Your love has seen me through all my days
I stand here by Your grace
On this altar I've written my life
Tells of a story I have with You my Lord
I want the world to know

Chorus
God of my forever
And forever I'm with You
My life is saved with a price
Your sacrifice redeemed my soul
God of my forever
And forever I will sing
My greatest honor will always be
To serve my Lord and King

Verse 2
God of my all I've surrendered
My heart finds its rest in Your word
Praises will not be enough to show
How my love for You has grown
Nothing matters when You're here with me
In the end just to hear You say "Well done"
Bowing before Your throne

Photos from Korea ...

Due to popular demand, here are the photos before I post my article .. I've been too busy to finish writing .. :)

Back from Korea!!

I'm back from Korea! :)

The lessons, experiences, blessings and anointings were so many and so great! Received so many things that I could probably write a book!

Well, I'll post some photos soon and write out my experiences - in the mean time, I'm back and ready to do greater things for His Kingdom!! :)

Off to Osanri!

Flying off to Korea tomorrow night to attend the Yoido Full Gospel Church Missions Conference.

It's the biggest church in the world!! 800,000 members .. imagine ... The number of Singapore citizens living in Singapore is only ~2,973,091 .. so 800,000 is slightly more than 1/4 the number of Singaporeans in Singapore! Wow!! 1 in 4 Singaporeans going to the same church every Sunday .. Imagine that .. that's Massive! :)

Besides seeing the biggest church in the world, we're gonna be living on Osanri Prayer mountain. No hotel rooms, no hot water - it's dormitory style living and I'm so looking forward to roughing it out and getting that needed dose of adventure! :)

And, living on a mountain means one thing - DARK SKIES!! Lots of STARS!! :)

Most importantly, this is gonna be a trip of prayer and meeting God. To seek Him in the plans He has for me and to know Him in a deeper way. :)

Boy! Am I excited!!

See you in 2 weeks!! :)

Commuting

I hate Commuting by public transport! :)

Ok, now that we've gotten that out of the way, I realised something very significant. Other than being a total waste of travelling time compared to traveling by car or taxi, taking the bus can be a great way to get in touch with yourself and to spend time thinking. :)

I realised that most of the ideas I've got for my music, my teaching, my business, my ministry and so many other things in my life come from the humble bus commute. That is the one time where I don't have to pay attention to anything and my mind is free to dream, to imagine and to be creative.

Ironically, the bus is the birthplace of many great things and ideas that are happening in my life. Cos that's also the place where my mind is free to listen to God, not having to worry (or not being able to worry) about the other things in life. I mean, where else can I go? :)

So ... Public Buses are not so bad after all .. :)

Adventure in Bangkok?

ad·ven·ture (ād-věn'chər) -

1.	an exciting or very unusual experience.

2.	participation in exciting undertakings or enterprises: the spirit of adventure.

3.	a bold, usually risky undertaking; hazardous action of uncertain outcome.

Just got back from Bangkok with a few church friends on Fri night. It was a good break, time to get away, time to have a little adventure. :)

Other than being just a fun trip, I learnt a lot about myself, and about the people in my travel group. It was a good thing - these are people I will be working with in the church ministry and it's good to know them in a different context other than in church or going for meals together.

The best way to know people is to live with them, travel with them and do stuff with them. In a different country, where someone is released from his/her comfort zone, the little things that make up a person are revealed. :)

One thing that really struck me during this trip and actually surprised me, was that I just feel like I'm wired so differently from the rest of the group. I always ASSUMED that ALL young people (under 30? 35 maybe?) would be adventurous, willing to try new things, go new places .....

I learnt that not everyone is adventurous, or maybe everyone has a different threshold for adventure. Maybe it's the way we're brought up or the culture we're moulded into.

I do believe, however, that every MAN has a longing for adventure, a longing to get out and do something that's different, to challenge the thresholds of what is comfortable. Even if they do not realize it, there is a desire to just be the man that he is, to be WILD AT HEART.

Today's culture and society has turned our men into over-careful, over-cautious people who do not have the drive to go out and experience what the world has to offer. Without that personal drive in a man, it is impossible for them to lead the ladies onto that journey of adventure that is being suppressed in today's society.

So what has all these got to do with the trip?

The trip has taught me that it is important for ALL men to know the inner desires of their heart - to engage with the way our hearts are wired, to be willing to take risks and experience the world, to step out of what society and culture has made us comfortable with and most importantly, to lead our sisters on this journey with us.

Besides shopping, eating and sight-seeing, Bangkok has taught me something new about the dynamics in a group. It is my desire to let the brothers understand the REAL boundaries of manhood - to fight for it and not be boxed up by the SMALL box society has placed us in.

I'm flying off to Korea this Saturday night, and I'm praying for God to let this trip be one of REAL adventure - to explore the beauty God has made in the world, but more importantly, to engage in who I really am and my true identity in Him.

I also see a pressing need to allow the youths of today to understand who they really are - I'm gonna start a book study on the wonderful book, "Wild at Heart" by John Eldredge, in a hope of allowing them to discover the secrets to their soul.














Anyway, here are some photos from the trip for your viewing pleasure. :)

I'm self-employed!!

Well, I've been down with a terrible flu the last couple of days - whole body aching, waking up with GREEN stuff coming out my nose etc.

Going through all that, I had to force myself to plan my teaching, plan the ministry, go and teach etc.

All of a sudden, I realised THIS IS WHAT IT"S LIKE TO BE SELF-EMPLOYED!!

When I was working for a company or an organisation, anytime I was sick, I could just get an MC. Now, the "company" I'm working for is my own, and whether I'm sick or not, I still have to carry on .

Wow!! It's scary! I realise that from now, it's no longer fixed income whether I work or not, no more medical benefits, no more annual leave .... HAHA

So this is what being self-employed means!!

One thing I know though - I'm gonna be honest with my taxes and God will bless .. HAHA .. :)

Wait on the Promises of God

This week has been tough. Really tough. Been spending lots of time in prayer and planning for the Creative Arts Ministry in my church and seeking direction for what to do in my future.

In everything I do, I believe it's 100% God AND 100% man .. we gotta put in our full effort so that God can release our full potential. Never could understand how some people can just sit around and pray while not doing 100% of what they can for God to use their effort.

I've recently been involved in a few discussions and conversations and I realized a common thread - people tend to look forward more to the rest than the work. :) To these people, the work; whether it is a job, ministry or social event, is more of a chore than a joy.
These people will do the job out of responsibility, but not enjoy the completeness of joy and satisfaction it brings because they are looking not for the completion of the work but the rest after the work. :)

One thing I got from Ps Kong Hee during Emerge 2007 is this - Successful people work 16 hours a day!


I'm not saying we should all go out a work 16 hours today, but think about it, if we maximise the 4, 6 or 8 hours of work we have today, God will increase our capacities in our jobs, our ministries and our social life so that we will NEED to work 16 hours a day gradually. If you think about it, if you NEED to work 16 hours a day, it just means you've got great responsibilities at work, you've got a big and growing ministry and you've got lots of friends. :)

So why is this entry called "Waiting on the Promises of God?"

In the athletic world, the word REST does not mean staying at home and not doing anything. It MIGHT mean that, but more often than not, when athletes say rest, they mean an active rest. Probably running half the distance they normally do or training at a lower intensity. Why do they do that? Cos if they completely stop training for just 3 days, their capacity will drop. :)

In the same way as Christians, when we WAIT on the promises of God, we don't just sit there and wait, mumbling prayers to God. We have to fulfill our responsibilities in EXPECTANCY of God's promises to be fulfilled. We have to prepare the platform to be ready when His promises are fulfilled and not be caught surprised and unprepared when the big gift arrives.

Anyway, I just wanna share that this has been a period of waiting in my life, but at the same time capturing God's promises and making sure I fulfill my potential in His promises. :)

Hillsong Conference??

Wow! I just got a msg from my good friend David in Australia saying he has an extra Hillsong conference ticket and he asks me if I wanna go. :)

I REALLY wanna attend this conference and seek the Lord for what He has installed for the creative arts ministries and how the Holy Spirit is flowing in that direction.

So, not having enough money to buy the air tickets, I decided to sell my precious telescope. I'm trusting the Lord that He will provide and He will honour the sacrifice.

If you're reading this, please pray along with me. I've got about 2 days to raise ~$1000 for air tickets, food and accommodation etc.

I'm ARAGORN!!!

Putting your appointed path ahead of any inner conflicts, you make your own rules for the benefit of all.

If my life or death I can protect you, I will.

Aragorn is a character in the Middle-Earth universe. There is a description of him at TheOneRing.net.

Is this the REAL ME??

I don't even know if this is the REAL me!! HAHA .. I thought it was accurate at first .. but after that .. hmmmm .... :)


Utmost in your mind is success. You are constantly seeking stimulation and a life full of experience. You are trying to 'grow' and above all you need to develop freely and to shake off the shackles of self-doubt. You are an enthusiastic individual, full of life with the desire to live intensely. You like contact with others and are enthusiastic by nature. You are receptive to anything new, modern or intriguing. Your interests are many and you are likely to expand your fields of activities. You are optimistic about the future and you deserve every success because deep down you are a 'winner'.

You are not feeling so good at this time. Everything seems to be getting on top of you. What you need is a rest from all of the the present trials and tribulations in peaceful surroundings and with someone - male or female, it doesn't really matter - who can really understand you and appreciates your needs.

You feel truly deprived - not getting your fair share, but you have accepted the fact that that is the way things are at this time and that it is prudent to let matters slide and not hit your head against the wall -so conform and agree for a while. Accept the situation - nothing can last forever.

You are an emotional, sincere and impressionable individual experiencing frustration and unnecessary stress. You are carried away by other people's enthusiasm and looking for that idealised relationship, be it in a business or personal situation, which you are able to share with a mutual depth of understanding. You have lowered your defences in the past and you have been hurt, so you are now extremely wary of being exploited. You are still ready to trust people on the condition that they are prepared to offer you proof of their sincerity.

You really would like to be completely uninhibited - to let your hair down - but you are held back by your sense of logic and rationalilty, since you realise that by simple stupidity you could lose everything - whatever that may be.

Best Camp 07

Just got back from Youth Camp 07 .. it was fun - physically, spiritually and guess what ... musically too .. HAHA

God's presence was in the camp and I'm praying hard for the fire to continually burn stronger in the youths!

Lot's of fun was to be had - HipHop, Ubin Adventure, TalentTime, Best dressed competition ...

Anyway, here are some pics - taken with my cam, will try to post more from other cameras soon .. :)

Outdoors, friends, youth ...

Been a busy week, realigning my life with God's purpose and doing what I can for my ministry, my youths etc. Was actually quite a fulfilling week, got quite a bit done and I learnt a very good lesson - that if a team of people is composed of the right mix of people, the team will go VERY FAR. Learnt this from the camp committee for next week's youth camp. There are leaders, there are workers; there are the creative people and there are the logical people; there are the not so detailed, and there are the detailed. :)
A great team! :)




One other thing I realized - I saw a photo of me exactly one day before I started exercising 1.5 months ago, and one taken today ... you see for yourself ..

Before ...






After ...



I'm pretty encouraged! I mean .. it's only 6 weeks!!

New Friends, New Insights, New Opportunities

Went to the airport on Monday to send off some guys at the airport. They're from Taiwan but came to Singapore for 3 days just to attend drum fest 2007.
It's always nice to meet people who have the same passion for music. Had a very enjoyable one hour with them just talking bout music, church and stuff.
One of the guys, Nick, owns a studio and we talked about studios and even working together between the 2 of us on some projects. Sounds like FUN!!

Birthday of Shoes!!

This birthday is kinda special .. I got 3THREE3 pairs of shoes for my Birthday!!!


From left: Teva Sandals to replace an old pair that lasted me 4 years!! You pay for what you get, and quality is always worth paying for. :)

In the middle is a pair of funky Timberland leather boots to replace my old crummy pair of Timberlands which lasted me 6 years! :) Once again, paid for quality 6 years ago and it's all worth it. These boots look good with anything! Perfectly comfortable too!!

On the left is my new pair of Asics running shoes to kick start my running! :) Fits well, makes me run faster too .... I think .. haha .. :) I'm going for a Marathon!!


Other than my shoes, I got a Wheel Exerciser too. A few of the guys at church had a go at doing it the "manly" way, in the end, only Esmond and myself succeeded in doing it the proper way. The other guys couldn't even do one rep. HAHAHA .. we really had a good laugh.
I'm so encouraged, at least exercising paid off, I'm quite sure I couldn't have done that one rep 4 weeks ago.

If you're wondering what a Wheel Exerciser looks like, here it is:


In the picture on the box, the lady is doing it the "girly" way, according to Alex and Joel. The "manly" way is when you put your feet on the ground and straighten your body (almost parallel to the floor) and bring yourself up. It's TOUGH!!

One Life, One Love

Heard this very very powerful song during Emerge 2007 and I was instantly touched. Song was written by one of the most talented Christian songwriters in this generation, Brother KC Gan from CHC. He is one the role models in my life - just reading his blog and listening to his songs has made me grown so much.

Furthermore, he's a bass player too! :) Everytime I hear a new song from him, I'm encouraged that I too can write songs like that for my church. Oh Lord, I need your ANOINTING! :)

When I heard this song, it so encouraged me so much - like a reaffirmation that God knew me from the start and had my destiny plotted for me right from the beginning. It was a also a call for me to REALLY lay my life at the altar, to love Him with everything I had, to follow His word and to have a broken heart before Him.

Oh man, you really have to hear this song! :)

One Life, One Love
Words and music by Brendon Seetoh & KC Gan
2007 City Harvest Church

Who am I, that you would know me from the start
Set me apart.
Who am I, that you would place eternity into my heart

You have given to me more than this world could give
My purpose is found in you

One life, I lay at your altar
One love, I have with you
Touch me again, fill me as you hold my outstretched hands
One word, you know I will follow
One heart, broken to you
Use me again, your mercies follow me,
for all my days

In your presence, in your power,
Holy Spirit I surrender

Emerge 2007!!

Emerge 2007 really touched me. I think it'll take a few entries to finish my thoughts and how this powerful conference impacted me! :)

Anyway, the first thing that will impress anyone attending City Harvest Church services, is how the youths are willing to come 3 hours before service starts just to queue to get in to the service and to get good seats.

That is a physical act of spiritual thirst and hunger that is just so exciting to see in today's youths!


Just look at the queue and the number of people!! :)


You know the other thing that impressed me? The organisers had ample bottled water prepared to people queuing and they even moved the queue into an air-conditioned hall on the third day. These are things they didn't have to do, but it just goes to show the amount of detail and love the organisers have. :)

Ushers distributing water

Ok, those are just initial thoughts. :) I shall go more "in-depth" in my next entry. Stay Tuned!